Wolfstar Kinktober 2025

by snowsun1970 (ao3)

Chapter 1

Day 1: Aftercare

Sirius is trembling, not from fear or pain, but he comes down from the aftermath of his evening with Remus. From the echo of being held down, worshipped, undone in a way that emptied him out and then filled him again over and over. Remus doesn’t speak at first. He never does, not right away, not when Sirius is in this state. Instead, he lets his hands do the talking gently, deliberately, and grounding. He starts with a slow exhale and brushes Sirius’s damp hair off his forehead.

“You’re alright,” he murmurs, lips grazing his temple. “You did so well for me. I’m so proud of you, Pads.” Sirius hums, mumbling something almost incoherent. All that Remus can really make out is ‘Moony’. “Take your time. Don’t force yourself to speak, Padfoot.” Sirius buries his head in Remus’ chest, exhausted. Finally, Remus taps Sirius, forcing him to move off his chest as he reaches for his wand. A warm, damp cloth, summoned wordlessly with a flick of Remus’ wand, appears on the bedside table. Remus starts with Sirius’s chest, wiping away sweat and the residue of their intimacy. He moves slowly, carefully, watching Sirius’s face the entire time. He’s gentle as he touches Sirius, avoiding overwhelming him. “Tell me if anything bothers you, okay Pads?” he says softly, even though he knows Sirius likely won't yet. But he says it anyway, every time. Sirius was that important to him. He can’t lose that boy, he has to protect him no matter what. He continues through their usual routine, moving from Sirius’ chest to his thighs. Sirius twitches, pulling away from the touch after a moment. “Hey, hey. It’s okay, Pads. It’s just me, tell me when you’re ready.” Finally, Sirius speaks. It's delicate and weak.

“Sorry, go ahead.” It’s the only thing he can really get out, mind still overwhelmed from their moment together. Remus touches his thighs, brushing over them like a feather, trying to be as delicate as possible as not to disturb the boy under him. Finally, after cleaning him up fully, he covers his boyfriend in a soft blanket, letting him lie there for a moment. Finally, Remus lies back down next to Sirius, engulfing him in his touch. One hand rubs slow, lazy circles into the small of Sirius’s back. The other cradles the back of his neck.

“You still with me, Pads?” He whispers against Sirius’ collarbone, delicately. He does everything he can not to startle the beautiful black haired boy lying against him. Sirius nods, it’s delicate and gentle and what Remus needs to affirm that his boy is still there at the moment.
Later, as Sirius becomes more lucid, Remus runs him a bath. He takes the boy out, not evening forcing Sirius to stand. He puts him in the warm bath water and washes his hair for him.

“How are you feeling, babe?”

“Fine, better. Sorry I shut down all the time.” Remus immediately shushes Sirius.

“Never apologize to me for shutting down, Sirius. I do everything I can to protect you, you’re allowed to shut down with me.” He presses a kiss against Sirius’ cheek and then pulls away from the boy, grabbing a towel and pajamas. “Come back to our room when you’re ready. I’ll put on a movie, alright? Plus, I’ll cook dinner tonight.” Sirius smiles, a delicate sweet one. How did he deserve a boy like Remus?

Remus held Sirius until he was fully grounded and beyond. He cooked them dinner that evening, some pasta dish that he saw online. Sirius adored it, though. He fell asleep holding Sirius, the boy tucked beneath Remus’ chin, held closely, as a movie played in the background.

Chapter 2: Day One (Part two)

Day one part two: Aftercare

The room is quiet, save for the sound of their breathing.

The sheets are tangled at their waists. Remus is on his back, facing the ceiling, Sirius against his chest, as Remus lies there shaking.

It's not the same violent tremor he holds after the full moon, not the heat of the transformation or the fear connected. A gentle, subtler, smaller shaking. His fingers curl loosely into the worn sheets, breath catching at the top of his chest, like he’s forgotten how to exhale. Sirius against his chest, long hair sprawling against Remus’ scars and the bed. He’s quiet, still, watching Remus’ chest heave.

It was beautiful. Intense. Maybe too intense.

Not because Remus hadn’t wanted it, no, he'd asked for it, whispered Sirius’s name like a prayer, but because Sirius had seen the tremble in his hands even as they clung to his shoulders. The way his mouth said yes but his eyes said don’t disappear when it’s over. Sirius doesn’t disappear, he would never disappear.

“It’s alright Remus,” His French accent echoes through their shared bedroom. His voice is soft, gentle enough not to startle the werewolf, “you’re alright.” Remus’ eyes drift down to the boy against him. His delicate porcelain skin against Remus’ scarred body. Remus’ hand finds Sirius’ hair, running his digits through their curls.

“I know, Pads,” Remus’ Welsh accent is thicker than Sirius’ French one. Deeper and thicker and more booming through the room. Although, the way Remus speaks it feels like he’s a thousand miles away. “I just need a second, I’ll be fine.” Sirius nods against Remus’ chest. He knows that tone, the way Remus disappears sometimes after things get too heated. How he recoils, afraid that Sirius wouldn’t love him anymore. The way he falls away both metaphorically and physically, after he transforms, after they get too close. The fear of hurting the one thing he’s ever loved this much.

“What do you need, Moony?” Sirius’ voice is gentle, he sits up, lining his face up with Remus’. He loves Remus more than anything, more than life itself. He and James were the first people to make him feel truly loved, in a way no one else did before and no one will after.

“Can you just… stay with me, star?”

“Always. You wanna talk?” Sirius reaffirms what Remus wants. Actually, what Remus needs right now. He wants to do right by him, in every way possible. Remus is always ready to take care of Sirius, on a daily basis. Whether it be monetarily, emotionally, physically, or sexually, Remus would drop everything for Sirius, and Sirius vice versa. He just wants to reaffirm it in Remus’ mind.

“Talk, please. I wanna hear your voice.” There's a small bit of desperation in Remus’ tone. He’s almost begging Sirius. So, he speaks. Sirius just sits there and talks. He talks about how drunk he got the night before with James. How he took a walk in the park today and saw a dog that looked just like Padfoot. How he knew Remus would’ve loved it if he was there. How today when he was at practice with his band of Marlene, Lily, and James that a muggle stopped them and told Sirius how gorgeous he was. How they were obviously drunk off their ass, and how the only thing he could think about was when he got home telling Remus. Slowly, in time, Remus comes back. Gentle laughter, a playful comment every so often. The more Remus spoke, the more excited Sirius got. The more happy Sirius got.

“You know, Moony. I’m lucky to have an idiot like you.” Sirius balances himself up on the bed with his elbows, his bare body still covered by the blanket they share. “I’ve got the best boyfriend in all of Europe, I think.”

Remus lets out a small smile, looking down at the boy.

“I’m sorry, Pads. I didn’t mean to fall apart like that.” Remus’ voice trembles, it’s gentle, almost like he wants to cry because he loves Sirius so much.

Sirius shakes his head. “You didn’t fall apart. You let go. There’s a difference, Rem.”

Remus swallows hard. “I just, I’m sorry Pads, sometimes after, I forget I’m allowed to feel okay. Like what if I fucked us up. I don’t wanna lose-” Sirius cuts him off with a kiss, a sweet passionate one, with no heat behind it. A desire to just be there with him, to be loved and needed. He runs his hands through Remus’ hair, drifting further into the kiss, before finally pulling away.

“You’re allowed,” Sirius whispers against his lips, brushing a hand through Remus’s hair, untangling the curls gently. “You’re allowed to feel safe. Especially here. With me.”

“I’m not used to this.”

“I know.” Sirius rests their foreheads together. “You don’t have to be, Remus. You never have to be if you don’t think you can. I just want us to be your new normal. This, to be your new normal.” When it's just them, nothing matters. Not Walburga or Orion or Regulus. Not anyone out to hurt them. Not James or Lily or Peter or Marlene. No one matters, not as much as each other. “We don’t have to get any of this shit right, Remus. Let's just stay right here, together.”

Remus closes his eyes. Nods.

“I want to stay, too,” he whispers.

They lie there for a long time, wrapped around each other like warmth itself. The rain taps against the glass, but in this room, it’s quiet.

And when Remus finally falls asleep, it’s with Sirius’s hand on his chest steady, real, and here.